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Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Loner

I was visiting Crystal Jigsaws blog when she mentioned she was a loner.   I thought of how much we are alike even though we don't know each other.  Parts of her life are different then mine but there is a lot we share.

I was raised in a foster home.  I had a great foster family but I was always 'that girl Mrs. North raised.'  Sometimes, I think she was the only one who saw me as her daughter and not 'that girl'.  I had a great family but I always felt like I was the little kid, standing outside the window of home where a family lived.  I watched all the did, but I knew I could never be a part of it.

When I was in high school, I was the one who sat in the back of the room and just tried to melt into the wall.  I liked school but I never felt part of any group.  I had a few friends but preferred just walking my dog or reading my favorite book.

Married, I never felt part of my husband family.  When the others all had kids and I did not, I felt like I was again, outside that window, watching a family and not being a part of it.  I envied my inlaws because they were part of a family and I was not.  (my mother in law loves me dearly and was shocked when I talked to her about this one time.  She said she always loved me like a daughter)

But I am a loner.  I am happy being alone most of the time.  I have friends and I do see them but I am not the party going type.  I go to things and have fun but I want to leave when I am ready so I can get back to my hobbies and just my alone time.  I like it.

It does not bother me that I live out in the country with my animals. People will say, you have a lovely place but I could never stand living out here.  It is too quiet and lonely.  I am not lonely.  There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely.

9 comments:

  1. I am quite a loner myself. Definitely not a joiner. I would love to live out in the country (again). Few people believe I am introverted as I appear to be outgoing. My husband does most of the schmoozing and I just go along. It works. I do like a party - but that's probably because I tend to have a few drinks and get out of myself.

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  2. Me too! Seems I can get more Done!Hahaaa
    hughugs

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  3. We are soooooo much alike too my friend. I have been married to Linda since 04 and still do not really feel related to any of her family. I would be perfectly content to be in the mountains in a little cabin right by myself if it were not for Linda. Of course I would have to have a dog but that would be all I would need except nature and quiet.

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  4. There's all the difference in the world, between being a loner, and being lonely - I too, was born a loner. I think the 'all in together girls' are the odd ones! LOL

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  5. However you are content with yourself is all that matters. I love living out in the woods and not having to deal with people much anymore. I like being me.

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  6. So true Garnet!! I do like being alone, but I don't like feeling lonely! Love Di ♥

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  7. I might take another loner to "get" you on this post. I do need my family but not too many people too often.

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  8. I love being with people and I love my alone time so I don't know how I would describe myself. I need a balance in my life for sure. I felt bad when you said you were outside looking in, I have felt that pain at times since my husband passed away......:-)Hugs

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  9. I am now and have always been a loner I have always prefered my own company to that of others I love it when I am home alone and I never get lonely I do not think I have ever been lonely........At shcool I had a few friends but we really only hang out at school and rarely saw each other outside of school. Sometimes I am amazed that I am married and have a family and you know what is kind of funny I married a loner so we do not have friends we have family it is what it is and we are happy with our lifes the way they are.

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