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Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Just Rambling.....

It three in the morning, well almost.  My mind is racing and I cannot sleep. 

My eldest's counselor called and said they are recommending she stay down in the area she is in and they want her to go to a half way house for a few months rather then come back here.  I feel that is best for her.  I would love having her closer but people back her trigger her drinking and drug problem and I think if she stays down there around people who will not do that, she stands a better chance of complete recovery.  We plan to go down there again to meet with the counselor and talk things over on the 29th. If the roads are bad, we may do the meeting via phone.

My phone was going so I went out and bought one.  I did not know til I got it home that it did not have a built in answering machine so I will keep the old one for the answering machine and just use the newer ones for talking.   I know I could get my messages via the phone company but  I prefer the answering machine.  I guess I am old fashioned in that way.  I like doing my own messaging.

Monday was Kris's 27th birthday so I took her out to eat chinese today and we gave her a gift certificate for her birthday.  I also had some to use for the book store so I got three books and got her three.  I am so glad she is sharing books with me again.  I read them then give them to her.  She has changed since the seperation from her husband. In some ways, I can see the old Kris back. She laughs alot more. I think her husband who about to become her ex is a good boy but he is really more of a boy then a man and she needs a man.  He is so nice but so immature and it was not good for their marriage.  You know what I mean?  He would not further himself and was not acting like a man. He liked to drink too much and hang out with the boys too much.  She wanted him to go to counseling and he would not go.  He has no clue what it is like in a church and I think they both need some of that.    I am not in favor of a divorce but it is not my life and I do not know how long I could handle someone who drank as much he does.  I suspect he was running around on her but she does not like to talk about it except she did mention he had someone when they lived in North Carolina.

I just never thought our family would be facing a divorce of any kind and I like so many things about him. It is hard for us to imagine him as not being part of the family.  I just wished he matured.

I do know I would not put up with a man who cheated on me or abused me in any way.  I was going to marry one like that and I was so glad I did not marry him.  I got a good one and I would not trade him for anything.

I will hate to get on the scales when I go to the dr. I was doing well with my weight loss but I am afraid this last month has done me in with all the Christmas eating then the birthday celebrations (my husband baked a rum cake for Kris while we were shopping and we had that with some strawberry ice cream when we came home.)

All in all, it was a good day...


  1. I have had some of the same stuff happen in my family. Never nice to think about but usually it is for the best. I also had way too much munchies during the last month mainly because it all around me and I simply could not resist. I hope to get back on track. Have a great rest of the week. :)

  2. I think it's best to move on with her life...bless her heart!
    I also agree with you about Eldest staying put...

  3. Good luck to both of them and you too. Some guys just don't grow up -- or at least not nearly soon enough.

  4. It is hard to sleep with so much going on in the family isn't it. I pray that the chatter in your mind settled and you finally were able to get some rest.
    I think it best that your daughter is away from things that triggers her addictions. Divorce is so hard on everyone but your daughter has made a decision and is moving forward, will keep them in my prayers.....:-) Hugs

  5. It's hard when loved ones' divorce because you've come to love the non-blood half & you feel a loss as well. It sounds like he hadn't really put a commitment in the marriage. It might be best, with a man who won't grow up, to end it earlier as it isn't likely to end well any way and she can get on with her life.

  6. Springtime will make us feel more like losing weight Garnet. It's hard when we're stuck in the house! As foe your daughters husband, I can relate. My first husband acted like he wasn't married too. Things all worked out in the end and I have a wonderful husband now!
    Love Di ♥

  7. A rough road for both your girls but at least they are trying to improve their lives. That is a very good thing. Divorce is not a nice thing but sometimes it is for the better. At least they have 2 parents who love them!!!!

  8. I think it's good that your daughter doesn't come back and be influenced by all the people she once hung out with until she is strong enough to stand on her own. I know for me, I had to seperate myself from all the people that I did drugs with for a long time. The thing is that they didn't really want to hang out with me if I wasn't going to be getting high...and after awhile I had not interest in hanging out with them. With my mind clear I was able to see them and their lives for what they were.

    I know it's sad that your other daughter is getting a divorce but you also don't want your daughter living with someone that is not really nice to her or not being a part of the family and whom has very likely been cheating. The selfishness of drugs or alcohol make it very hard for the addict to choose their loved ones over their drug of choice. It doesn't surprise me that she seems more happy...just think how much she was suffering silently and not wanting to say anything to upset her family...I pray that she will get strong and see that her life can be so much better.

    Your girls are very blessed to have you as their mom...I know it's hard for you and you worry(what mother doesn't? :) but thank God they have you and your husband. I will pray that you are able to sleep. XX